Our Worship of Personalized Prophets
Have you ever thought long and hard about the gimmicks of the world? It’s actually quite simple of a thought nowadays. All you have to do is search something, anything at all online and you’ll get a service popping up on social media through ad banners and even real enough looking accounts.
We’re suckers for a good deal and even worse, we’re suckers for the prospect of improving life within a few short clicks of a mindless and “personalized” quiz. You see, we used to believe that we were still smarter than the companies that program auto responses to fill our every needs. Pop up ads and magazine quizzes are now outmoded though, and the rise of personalized services has taken off faster than a lot of other fads (you know the ones, the brick and mortar specialty shops and conveniently deceptive marketing ploys cough cough pyramid schemes that your moms friends badgered everyone on facebook for 3 months before miraculously gaining all that weight back after drinking shakes and praying to some skinny idol who “lost it all without doing a minute of cardio!”). Now, every scheme is perfectly packaged to appeal to the aesthetic of Instagram’s Cali clean chic vibe.
In a matter of 10 minutes I can find a personalized haircare regiment, perfected vitamin mix, food plan to lose 20 lbs in 3 weeks and the complementary exercises taught by a masterful guru, who in no way has more access to surgeons, PR teams and a real local trainer at the fancy clean smelling gym in that rich town with the Whole Foods.
You see my real gripe with the time of personalized prophets is that I end up feeling no different than when I started. The real problem is in why I’m seeking a fix in the first place. Will a new hair care product really fix my hair problems forever, or does the flashy appeal of a “holistically oriented and completely organic company” make me feel a bit more elitist? It’s the feeling of having a unique experience that drives me to more easily make a purchase without second thought.
But am at risk of losing that normal sense of self? Okay that sounds pretentious, but seriously, what’s wrong with going to the drug store and getting Pantene or makeup that’s on sale? Why not just walk outside or play with my dog for extra exercise? And why am I looking to a personalized service to tell me something about myself other than the fact that I want to avoid real interaction?
Sure the ploy is to help busy people make their lives easier, but are we so busy that we can’t make the annoying Sunday trip to the store for the deodorant that we’ve used since puberty? I don’t know if these are really gimmicks anymore or if it’s just us becoming the gimmicks. Sure, I’ll still probably sign up for a few more needless free services or take a personalized skincare quiz because it’s all the rage for a new you.
However, I sure as hell will relish in the fact that I will never fully abandon my real self. The one who picks the cheapest products because they work just the same and the one who puts the damn phone down to have a normal conversation about how it’s too hot or cold, the fact that my car is in desperate need of an oil change and the odd thing my mom saw while driving (I kid you not it was a man walking through a shopping center carrying a saddle).
If nothing else please stop praying to these personalized prophets and go have a boring conversation about life with the people actually in your life – even if you’re trying to escape them by being on Instagram in the first place.
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